Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
Don't worry. I just took 2 benadryls and beat off. I'm practically sleep texting
I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
Please tell me the foreign boys in the kitchen this morning were yours.
The dingo escaped by eating a hole through my screen door. It's loose in the city somewhere.
By the way when you were super fucked up last night, you ate cat food and tried to tell me it was healthy for you
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
Like, you've got the smoothest dick in the west. Do you moisturize?
Yes I do
You left a bit of molly on the table and my mom found it. She asked what it was, I said "not drugs"
She believed me because "leaving that much behind on the table would be a waste so obviously it's not drugs."
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
I paper cut my nipple reading mail topless
She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.
I'll text you tomorrow when I'm not in someone's torture cave if I don't by noon call for help.
Randomize
