i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
my roommate and her friend got reaallllly high last night and it looks like they played scrabble. one of their words is "nippal"
Drunk on an escalator. I fell like 15 flights of stairs without actually moving more than 5 feet.
I forgot not everyone drinks wine out of the bottle. My grandma just asked if i needed a glass with a disappointing look.
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
On the back of that comment, I've formed a theory that as a result of my brainwashing your drunk self actually believes that beards are your calling.
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
The only people who really get me are strippers and mascots for sports teams.
If you can't trust the person at the taco cabana drive thru, who can you trust?!
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
I just want to eat chicken fingers and drink beer and smoke in bed with my laptop so I can watch Netflix
So your not doing THAT great with the break up then...
I definitely almost just pulled a condom out of my purse instead of money for my dad.
Randomize
