Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
Just hungoverly hit my funny bone with a hot straightener. Triple threat.
The baby slept soo good last night. Its like he knows the importance of me being intoxicated all weekend.
I don't think the cop knew you were on ecstasy until you asked for a back rub.
I sorta feel bad for the actual person in my fake id that got a drunk in public charge.
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
A dry HJ only, please. I don't deserve the comforts of lube after my horrendous fantasy football performance
NO MAKING MOLDS OF ANYONES GENITALS
Fine. Suck all the fun out of life.
Your ex roommate is making out w the kid who pees on floors and it's kinda funny
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
Randomize
