This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
I overheard a kid saying to his mom at Walmart: "Mommy.. should we buy cups for daddy's spit?"
i asked a few people if they wanted to make pancakes with me but no one would. thats why i'm drunk by myself right now
as we were stuffing their 24 of beer into our bags you kept saying you wanted cheese strings. closest things we found were kraft singles. as the guys came up the stairs you kept screaming 'GET THE CHEESE! GET THE CHEESE!'
You were walking around with a baby carrier pretending your vodka was a baby. You tried to get pictures on santas lap
Listen man this isn't about soccer. It's about America and day drinking... Your two favorite things now get your ass over here
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
I just baptized the girl next to me. LONG LIVE THE CHURCH OF VODKA
I've shit my pants 4 times in 12 hours... Never trust a fart when u pass 30
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
Every now and then I'll meet one who is talented in the art of shower gymnast.
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
I JUST REALIZED THAT SINCE LEIA IS TECHNICALLY A PRINCESS AND KYLO REN IS HER SON AND STAR WARS IS OWNED BY DISNEY...KYLO REN IS LITERALLY A DISNEY PRINCE.
Oh my Gods. Why. Why did you have to tell me that. D:
SO YOU CAN SUFFER HAVING THAT KNOWLEDGE TOO.
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
Randomize