I have funfetti in my underwear...will you come get me?
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
no one should ever give us hovercrafts
Woke up naked in another mans house. If that keeps happening, then I probably need to go gay. You know to make it ok.
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
in respone to your voicemail you left me on saturday, yes i had gone to bed and no i was not still drinking at 5am
he kept doing his monologue, "if a vagina could talk."
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
Girl I love you like I've been drinking all day
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
wtf I can't believe that bar tender told on me to my mom
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
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