Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
dude.. you lit a cigarette on the bus and told the driver it was okay because you were fire marshall of your boy scout troop
There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
I don't think he understands what an important role his penis plays in my level of self esteem
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
Did you just buzz the apartment and throw shit at the window? Josh and rob came into my room and woke me up
Fuck you Ian. U owe me $3.65 cuz thasts what I thfrew at ur window trying to wake ur ass up. And fuck u for not giving a shit
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
She kept telling the ambulance to sit down and then started crying when we told her it couldn't hear her
you called me at 4 in the morning and invited me over for pasta and a late night viewing of titanic.
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
Its because she suspects I'm a frequent drug user, which I am, but I am going to make her feel like she is crazy for believing it.
When they said they were gonna tattoo each other's gamer tags on their asses, I knew I no longer had a boyfriend.
Randomize