After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
Sometimes he's such a bitch I forget that he's not actually a girl. Last night I asked him if I could borrow a tampon.
He had some in his pocket. That was weird.
I need you to promise me that the first one to find out our kids smoke weed, takes the weed so we can smoke it ourselves
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
I tried to smoke out of half a banana, and lit my nose hair on fire. So I feel like that sums up my life pretty well.
You threw away your W2 to make more room in your purse for liquor.
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
When you wanted to give that guy at McDonalds your number you asked the cashier if you could borrow "a pen or just like a straw with his blood on it". He gave you a pen.
I ended up sleeping with him in a public bathroom because neither of us remembered where we lived. I have hit a new low.
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
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