yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
drinking out of a sandbucket again
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
dude, you declined head because you wanted to tell her about how you put cinnamon in your weed. also, we're low on Chef Boyardee
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
Why did I puke in my shower caddy last night
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
what better to celebrate not being pregnant than to eat a bowl full of rum soaked pineapples?
She is carving a little coffin out of some wood for her hamster that died. I'm flying home tonight.
I hate that I will forever be known as the girl who puked on the front lawn. That only happened once.
I just bought two cartons of ice cream, 5 boxes of mac and cheese and a bridal magazine. Don't judge me.
I just realized I'm not wearing clothes. I think my pants may be in the kitchen but I have no idea where my shirt is. I'm kinda worried.
Ever been to a strip club with one stripper? I have. And she sucked.
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
Randomize
