So ignoring my calls doesnt work if you update your facebook a minute later.
ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
Somedays I wish I were a bird. Then people wouldn't be so grossed out when I vomit
Wait, how is it that I'm just getting ready to go out and you're already showing your penis to freshmen girls?
If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
I know you`re my best friend, but when i wake up with this bad of a hangover and no memories of last night, i dont want to see your tits ad my background.
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
He held the kayak still so I wouldn't tip over while projectile vomiting. If that ain't true love, I don't know what is...
Next time a random bus filled with santas pulls up to the bar, I'm not getting on it.
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
People are talking politics and I have had 9 mimosas
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
Does he know you were at a strip club taking shots of tequila right before you babysat his son?
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
Randomize
