Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
I fell asleep to the sounds of them banging in the next room. It was oddly soothing...
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
i really regret not blowing your cousin before he went to jail
Nope, sorry. Already took my bra off. All down hill from here. My next act will be crying, singing, and eating girl scout cookies in the shower. You can come watch the shit show though.
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.
Mike showed up naked and in handcuffs. Again. Feel free to come over and laugh because I'm not helping this time.
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
So I scratched the whole boyfriend plan and got wasted. Wanna try again tomorrow?
She started crying, nearly punched a guy, started smoking multiple cigarets backwards and broke the slide on her bong. Why do I always end up babysitting the crazy ones?
Randomize
