Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
the 3rd commandment: and god said, if you buy a handle.. you must finish it.
Washing the last semen-stained shirt you have really solidifies a breakup. It just got real.
we decided it was best to cut you off after we caught you trying to "baptize" my cat in the jungle juice
Don't be offended. I can't even stand sleeping next to my dildo after I'm done, let alone a whole person.
for future reference mormans are hard to crack but they give fucking amazing hand jobs.
We're about to go to a party titled 'Night of 1000 Jello Shots".
I just had a threesome in the back of my mom's van. I'm pretty sure the rest of my week is going to be epic.
I just made the pizza guy say helicopter six times in order to get his money. Even he knows how stoned we are.
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
I feel like my cat and I are playing mind games. I need more friends.
Randomize