I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
Margaritas are 250 calories. Now measuring all food in margaritas
She's laying here with her head in my lap stoned, eating Doritos, whining about her boyfriend, and listening to Cher. Fuck the friend zone.
I will not fill you in on the details until we get back, so do not ask. I got peed on by the girl I was hooking up with last night.
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
I threw up on my way to work while listening to "the good times are killing me". this award goes to modest mouse for creating the most poetic puke ever
OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
We 6 way cheers-ed with French fries last night, hammered, in the booth.
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
I realize ur driving andwont read this til u stop, but I'm sleeping in the bed of the pickup. Please don't hit a deer.
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
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