Yeah he had his two razors labeled "face" and "pubes". Should I be disgusted or impressed?
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
Well I almost walked away with an Irish guy's boarding pass and some south guy's dignity
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
He was still there when I ran half naked into my suitemate's room where she was skyping her boyfriend and I started singing I JUST HAD SEEEEX
The cop actually kicked the bitches out of the cab so we could get ours. I flipped them all off as the door was shutting. That drunk.
If you loved me you'd bring cheese fries and a condom
I just bought emergency deodorant at Dominick's and put it on in front of a homeless man while waiting for the bus. He laughed and said 'girl, you a mess'. This is my life.
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
Firstly: alligator costume is happening anyway. But I'll see what I can do about the balls.
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
I turn into such a nice and loving person when I take Vicodin
As long as it's before midnight it's cool. But it would be understandable to ring in my new year shitting myself just before I go to Iraq.
I will bring Jesus to court if he punishes me for that
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