One girl and one boy is just not enough.
i just had sex bonerless
i was watching some porn this morning and i realized i am blessed with a truly beautiful vagina
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
Youre at medical school. Im eating raw cookie dough, pickles, and orange juice. Naked. On a monday afternoon. I clearly make better life choices than you.
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
I literally saw him try to open a beer can with his anus. We need o step up our game.
Wondering when "babysitting" formed into "sleeping on the couch for five hours nursing a hangover and giving the kids Nyquil."
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
There was nowhere else for me to go. I'm like the island of misfit toys but I'm hot.
No, I'm not a weirdo, I keep bondage straps under my matress like a normal person, not a diary.
You don't know bruises until you've been banged by 3 drunk bagpipers in the back of thier bus
You need to stop showing people the things i drunk-text to you... i have a reputation to uphold here
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
I'm covered in bruises and scratches. I dont know whether to call them battlescars or sex decals
Randomize
