i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
What drug did you take that made the cabinets scream at you?
sometimes i think my sole purpose in life is to cockblock my roommate
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
Ok. I am hammered I will admit it but my legacy needs to live and your the only woman that could spawn satan. We need to talk.
He's currently surrounded by roughly 23 girls he fucked and never called. He may not make it out of here. Bar of doom? Or of redemption?
We found you in the middle of the road chucking gravel because "the house was too far away".
You were dancing with a coffee pot of rum in one hand and a joint in the other. So that should explain everything.
I'm still in my ugly sweater and underwear drinking coffee next to a plate of assorted treats we stole from the party. I got a new sweater by the way, its shoulderpad-y and looks like a news anchor got thrown up on by Liberace. I'm pretty proud.
Well then she has to know whoever you were kissing was in overalls because that's not a detail you just leave out.
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
the guy next to you kind of looks like a penguin. i'm going to fuck him
I am now gainfully employed. Parents, lock up your children.
Yay! Welcome to the world of "you're seriously trusting me with your kid?"
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