is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
Peach margaritas. And fuck whatever you're about to say, the girl to guy ratio is like 6:1. I need those odds
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
Everything's a blur with pockets full of jello
How could I forget your birthday? I have an alarm in my phone to ask you for sex that day.
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
Using the only finger i can move, i calculated body mass, intake and time. It's mathematically impossible for me to still have this hangover at 9pm. I passed out at 8pm last night. Fuck vodka.
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
WAKE THE EFF UP THE UBER DRIVER IS TRYING TO TAKE ME HOME
My move is emasculating men with my superior intellect and it's not as charming when they can't see my huge rack.
I wanna eat mushrooms and cuddle with a million dogs at once. I wanna know what heaven is like
I'll start working on my manners when you stop using please and thank you in the bedroom.
thank you for being so understanding of my weak stomach and poor self-control
Randomize
