would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
between my moustache and how drunk I am it will be a miracle if I get laid tonight.
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
they told you the "weed man" wouldn't come until you were asleep, like santa claus. you believed it.
I found what appears to be half an E pill and part of a tooth in my pocket this morning
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
I just sent a bad sext to my sister. There's not even a way to damage control this, is there?
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
Don’t fucking talk to that dude from monday!! Ethical consumption dude, don’t fuck shitty guys
Just ate 2 pieces of pizza in the shower.. New low or fuckin brilliant??
I usually do that but weve been going unprotected with tribal fertility symbols painted above my door
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
Randomize
