you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
So while she was giving me a lap dance I told her I quit med school. Just so she didn't feel like the only one who's made bad decisions in their life.
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
That's the point of day drinking, get fucked up by 6pm so you can get stuff done the next day. It's the adult thing to do.
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
Dear Jesus. Send me strength to not suck cock this morning.
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
I will go to bed dreaming of sexy Olympians carting me on a throne to the beach where they feed me pizza and champaign and massage my head/wash it like the hair dresser does.
Socially acceptable to sleep in a booth in the library? Its not finals but I dunno if I can make it back to south. Too drunk.
My bald co-worker just chugged a literal gallon of coffee. My condolences to his kidneys.
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