Turns out drinking large amounts of Gentleman Jack does NOT turn you into a Gentleman -- quite the opposite actually.
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
i feel like you're just hanging onto the edge of functioning wino.
Why do I love Florida? Because I just quit my job because it's too pretty a day to go to work and I'm going to the beach to eat seafood and drink beer.
For the record, just because I'm a mess doesn't mean I don't know what I'm talking about when I give you advice. I'm way better at other people's lives.
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
He said I have a comfortable vagina. What does that even mean?
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
Driving, getting head and talking to your boss on the phone is not a good combination. I nearly died
My liver is screaming fuck you right now.
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
Wearing Navy dress whites to a wedding is like having a magical panty removing device. I've never cockblocked a whole room just by existing before.
Should I be worried if two ants just crawled out of my purse?
Yes!
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
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