well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
She asked how far humans have gone into a volcano because they did in spy kids. She was serious.
i'm pretty sure they aren't charging me for that window i broke with a turkey sandwich while i was hammered.
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
If you hook up with a kid and the next day he breaks up with his girlfriend, those can be seen as two completely unrelated incidents right?!
I'm trying to be all porn star and he's making it all The Notebook
I am stoned, not wearing a bra, and a woman. There is no way in fuck I am getting on a fucking bus.
Are you saying I'm your favorite hot mess?
I'm actually my favorite my hot mess, but you're a close second.
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
I just don't think it's that outlandish to ask that I don't get messages from my husband at 8:30pm on a Wednesday telling me he peed on our cat
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
Randomize
