This is not my ceiling
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
I just realized I have my pepper spray, gun, and vibrator all in one drawer. One false grab and I'm screwed either way.
I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs.
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
Jesus I was next level high last night having a mental epiphany about the state of Virginia
I'm not sure if I should pay him or he should pay me, but someone should get paid for the sex I had this morning.
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
on a scale from 1 to "can't put a toothbrush in your mouth without gagging" how hungover are you?
I'm drunk and don't know where I am. There's a giant metal penguin if that helps.
Randomize
