I have to look really hot tonight because my personality is going to suck.
I don't remember. Are we still dating?
At lowes after workin outside. Kid behind me says "mommy that man smells like a taco" yes she was talking about me.
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
Just made a photo collage of the girls I've hooked up with this summer. I'm patting myself on my back right now
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
Me and tommy were trying to figure out why our printer was jammed, found a condom stuck in the paper slot. #collegeprobs
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
Awk moment when I forgot to tell my hookup about visitor parking so he got towed
I'm in his bed with no pants on and he's just eating a sloppy joe
Not my fault people bought me shots. waving a shot in my face is like waving a cock in yours
I'm either hallucinating or there is a dying cat outside my apartment....
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