He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
she sang that "this little piggy song" to my balls. and somehow made it work, with me only having two balls instead of five.
Dude, she told me she wanted to bang my dad. I don't know which is worse, the fact that she wants to or the fact that she told me.
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?
Can we skip lunch and do power hour sex time from now on? I'll let you eat nachos off my body if you really need the food.
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
He came back with a Butterfinger and vibrator batteries. There's no refusing him now.
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
To be honest, the last time I saw him he had a jesus costume on telling people to pray to his bible.
So he's at the chuch?
No, hooters.
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
Randomize
