I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
I think we should involve a squid next time we fuck.
u kno there is a reason i dont tell mi friends about u
u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
Homeless guy on the metro is drinking beer out of a coke bottle. Hello friend.
we were on a sandy mattress. i was wearing a sweatshirt with a poodle on it and eating a whopper jr. i wouldn't have fucked me either.
How dare you send me a picture after midnight that isn't porn. You know the rules.
I doubt were getting our security deposit back... the toilet just fell off the wall
A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
I don't want a baby! I JUST WANT AN ORGASM THAT ISN'T SELF INFLICTED.
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
We're trying to make our wedding vows nice but meeting on OkCupid fucks that up entirely.
Exactly man. Who needs doctors when you have vodka and hot knives.
So woke up naked and found my clothes from last night in my kitchen with a half eaten quesadilla
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
Randomize
