Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
hey, what are you doing tonight?
sleeping, g'night!
but i wanted to see you :(
sleeping! g'night!(801): i miss you!
stop - you have a right hand - use it!
It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
currently hungover, lying in bed and cutting cheese with my drivers license. ashamed? not even a little bit.
Within 24 hours, I went to a feminist documentary screening with two state reps and you hate fucked a rent-a-cop on the helipad of your hospital. Somewhere our lives went in different directions.
I still make more money.
I'm just going to lay in a blanket cocoon of self pity for the next few months.
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
My life is sponsored by tidy cat kitty litter, Bacardi rum, and plan b.
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
This is the drunkest I've ever been at a chili's
I'M CUDDLING WITH MY CAT AND THAT GUY SENT ME A DICK PIC. UNANNOUNCED DICK PICS ARE TERRIFYING AND MY CAT WILL NEVER BE THE SAME
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
Sorry I totally pulled a home invasion on you last night
That was super inconsiderate of me
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
Randomize
