Discovered the coffee filter hasn't been changed in a while. I believe the mold has hypnotic properties. Would try it again, but coffee vomit is not pleasant.
Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
so whats your words to drink to for the state of the union? mine are 'change' 'fight' and 'you know'.
mine is 'the'.
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
That was the most comfortable bag of doritos I have ever slept on!
I'm sorry. I really don't see what's wrong with pregaming before a wine tasting.This champagne won't drink itself.
The wine tasting is just for charity anyways...
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
So apparently we dropped beers outside the apartment last night, and someone RETURNED them! Ha like what? I just walked out the front door to Christmas in a box on my doorstep.
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
Dude, please wake him up, there are pills all over the floor and hes the only one who knows which ones to take simultaneously.
I have found random beers stashed in my purse and microwave... Apparently I thought 2015 was gonna have a beer shortage
he had to stop me from eating snow off the street on the way back to pick up our cars. that's how hungover i am.
From now on he's gonna have to shave first. It feels like I got eaten out by a chainsaw!
Do you think he will let me wear my neck fan while he throws my back out?
Please shut the fuck up.
Randomize
