I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
Yeah well I just ate cereal out of a muffin pan with a fork. I'll flip a coin as to who has to tackle that pile of dishes we've neglected for 3 weeks.
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
My glasses are somewhere in your living room. Also, my underwear might be in your bathroom or on or around your porch. Sorry.
i'm not sure when i reached "slam my own hand in the door" status but my half attached fingernail is not grateful.
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
And don't worry, my exact words were "I can't believe a baby came outta that thing"
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
THERE IS SOMEONE IN MY CAR MILKING HERSELF AND TELLING ME TO TRY IT
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
Chugging this bottle of Jim at the airport is proving more difficult than I imagined. TSA is not amused.
Randomize
