Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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Sorry phoenix623lol hasn't picked any favorites yet.

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(617): View more from Massachusetts

i wanna stay in my bed and fart for a few more hours

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(317): View more from Indiana

dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.

(1-317): View more from Indiana

details please.

(317): View more from Indiana

they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."

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(240): View more from Maryland

He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?

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(317): View more from Indiana

Your birthday is now over. Your day in the spotlight has dimmed and now you're as special as everyone else. The world goes back to revolving around me. Good night.

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(859): View more from Kentucky

I just wiped my butthole and there was glitter down there.

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