I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
I just witnessed Grandma making her infamous daiquiris. Extraordinary.
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
I think I'm a wingman for every guy who bangs a girl I scarred in highschool.
I'm just waiting til he drunkenly pisses in his new man's car the way he always whipped it out and went Bellagio in mine.
I need to buy fuckboy repellant for whenever I think it's a good idea to meet boys I found in tinder
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
Def don't remember taking those pics I sent you...but it looks like I was in a car? Shit. Looks like my Uber passenger rating just went up exponentially.
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
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