I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
At what point during this road trip should I let them know I've been drinking in the backseat the whole time and can't take my turn driving?
Step one go to argentina step two fuck bitches it's a simple plan really
There's still helium in the tank I found in the garbage outside the bar!
I want to be your penis for a week.
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
You are not going to get a pat on the back from me for not fucking that 40 year old again.
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
Threesomes are not as fun as you'd think. I left with a black eye and I'm not sure who's to blame.
On a scale of "huh, that's interesting" to "holy porn stars, batman". How good?
Definitely closer to "holy porn stars, batman".
Do you remember coming over and asking for toast and then singing that yeah toast song very loudly while you were dropping my bread all over my kitchen?
let me just take this time to thank you again for buying pudding.
You just kept telling everyone to call you MFT.. Mother Fucking Tornado.
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
Randomize
