Ppl just aren't as funny as we are
He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
So the bouncer told me I could leave the easy way or the hard way. I told him I was going to make him earn his 10 bucks that hour.
Apparently you chose the latter.
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
I'm at Lowes and I'm constantly looking for things to vomit in, just in case
when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
No clues in my phone. Only dialed call: my own social security number. And that was before 10:00pm.
I'm covered in sharpie and the girl next to me just said something smells like fried food. Hint: it's me. Why am I in class?
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
I've got mace and a condom. Ready to roll either way and keeping my pimp hand strong.
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
I don't think it's food poisoning, I think it's cause you cooked it over burning styrofoam
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
Executive decision.... we are cuddling naked
Soo I'm in the trunk of a car drunk about to jump on trampolines. My life rocks!
Randomize
