her voice is like 435,765 daggers being simultaneously twisted into my eardrum
i'd rather just be hit by a car than answer her phone calls
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
I couldn't even finish, she was lounder and more annoying than DJ Khaled
drunk pissing on my closed toilet lid is actually quite a sobering experience
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
One step ahead. Always. Roses are red, violets are blue... I'm gonna fuck you with a rake.
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
He keeps telling me he's gonna get me dope for my birthday. 1. HELP ME. 2. HOW IS THAT AN ACCEPTABLE BIRTHDAY PRESENT. Also, please HELP ME.
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
It was going very smoothly until she noticed my boner of hope.
my liver is dry heaving
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
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