Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
after last nights cooking expirments i have lost all faith in the fire alarm battery
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
My math professor just asked us to draw the graph of the derivative of our drunkenness from friday to sunday. Dear Jesus this looks bad.
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
I told her that if she blew me I would give her the empty pizza box in the fridge.... Why did she agree?
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
Also, I guess I made friends with the guy who caught me peeing behind a bush.
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
you take my contact solution?
drank it last night then filled it with brandy for the plane ride.
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
My life is over, I got a mugshot while wearing a shirt that said 'milf hunter'.
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