Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
I let a naked juice spill down my leg for like 30 minutes bc i thought i was hallucinating that my leg was cold.
How did you get a free t-shirt at the strip club?
I was attacked by whores
You threw up on yourself again didn't you?
They were strong whores
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
What procrastination leads to: I have submitted a third of my job applications this week with a BAC that would get me arrested
If you can handle my post-party look you da real MVP
Is it sad that I planned a a romantic trip to dunkin donuts for and with myself on Saturday, then added an equally romantic after midnight stroll through the half off candy sale? I find that worthy of adding a few cats to my collection agree?
I need a conscience and I need it yesterday.
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
This can only be settled by a dance off.
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
Randomize
