Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
Dude, hurry and get over. I need a wingman. She is on her 6th vodka shot and her resident ugly friend is still sober
Just found a hundred dollar bill on the ground. Hope you're looking to drink tonight
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
she named each of the players on the last ten madden covers in order and then shotgunned 2 beers...if she doesnt have a penis im in love
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
MOMMMMMMMMMMAYYY! YOU BIRFED ME TODAYY. IM CELEBRTIN ON YUR BEHAF! THANK YOU!!!!!
I always hoped you would never inherit this side of my personality. Hon, trust me, you're a mess. Go to bed...alone. xoxoxo
HOW DID YOU END UP IN THE BATHROOM WITH A DANCER AFTER 12 MINUTES?
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
The number of mornings I actually have to say out loud to myself "you must put pants on and go to work" to get motivated is...troubling.
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
can we not compare my dick to a children’s folk tale
I’m going to cut back. New Year, New Me
I would never wish less dick on anyone but do what you gotta do
Look get the dick out ur mouth and answer the phone
Randomize
