The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
My birth control alarm gets more depressing every night.
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
the girl next to me at the bar JUST looked down at her vagina and said "im going to get you fed". if i come home alone tonight...i give you permission to cut off my penis
I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
I feel like my chances would have been better if I hadn't told her "I need to fuck you before you leave."
I fucking give up. OKC is where small penises go to disappoint me.
My therapist thinks I shld paint u something to show u my appreciation 4 ur friendship. 1) she must think I'm rite on the brink of no friends 2) this is real
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
the only two hours i was sober on this trip and i managed to break my toe. no one will believe this.
I'm so glad I was blacked out while I was going all exorcist in the bathroom. That's so not a memory I want.
Her car is covered in frozen vomit, and she lost her iPhone. I'm also pretty sure I smoked crack last night. Rest in peace 2014.
Trusting in Jesus is not a viable birth control plan.
Randomize
