Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
Meh. I'll learn enough German to ask her for a handjob, then I'm out
You never cease to amaze me.
He confessed to putting dry erase marker dots on my vibrator to keep track of when I "electronically cheated" and then passed out.
Hung over. Bed full of legos for some reason. Not getting up. Come build stuff with me.
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
Its like the two hemispheres of my brain are in a death match but are two evenly matched for either side to win kinda drunk.
I got shot at last night. Lesson about married chicks: learned.
The shit I just took was my body's way of telling me bourbon and mixed nuts aren't an appropriate dinner. Well played, colon. WELL. PLAYED.
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
This is why we can never be together. Well that and we r married to other ppl but that's very minor detail compared to the coffee issue
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
That's brilliant but could get us arrested. Give me shots until I shout LET'S DO THIS
Randomize
