Sorry I totally forgot to text you back. When you texted me I was at work at the pharmacy and it was stupid busy. And then of course I had my 8 hour "shoot me b/c half of Loyola comes in to buy plan B" shift.
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
i just looked at the calendar to see when spring break is and literally stopped eating
I will never underestimate my ability to drunken ramble. At one point last night i think i was talking about hieroglyphics
At least it earned you a couple drinks. And something tells me you've touched grosser things with less incentive.
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
We've completely outdone ourselves. We packaged a collective total of six grams of pot and salvia into little bowl-sized tinfoil capsules. It's totally impossible to tell which is which without comparing, every Friday from now on we pick one out and see what the fuck happens
I didn't realize how drunk I was until my vagina was in the snow.
After the clumsiest day of my life I think it's safe to say my dream of being a ninja is dead. Memorial service with a glass of wine at 8pm
5% want to drink juice and feel better, 95% just want to touch your butt
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
If I had an Australian accent I'd be unstoppable. Teach me how you talk
I had to ask my mom to look for my kegle ball...
Randomize
