tonight's goal was "most regrettable decision" and you bring wine coolers?
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
i'm 6 minutes and 3 drinks deep before she gets here. she's do-able for a wednesday night, but i still need to mentally prepare, ya know?
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
Remind me tomorrow to take that ball-gag out of my purse.
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
Guys with integrity exist just to rain on my slut parade.
Just made a PowerPoint called "Reasons Why You Should Fuck Me" at his request. The sad thing is we've had sex before...
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
sometimes you just gotta eat tacobell at 2am and cry all your feelings out
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
I'm still alive btw, in case you were worried about my well being.
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
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