Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
So, we're in the car ready to fuck and she asks about my ex. I wave at my lap and say, "bye". She asks what I'm doing. I say, "waving goodbye to my erection"
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
I changed the background on my phone to a picture of you so whenever I go to look at porn or text another girl I'll have second thoughts
Am I supposed to find that romantic?
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
I just spend twenty minutes scrubing the "Happy Birthday" off of my vagina. He's never gonna forget this.
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman.
Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together
Shower sex is an art that should not be attemted drunk
I showed up to a job interview wearing two different shoes. If that's not an omen, I don't know what is.
The moral of the story is this:the last shot of the night is always a mistake
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
Randomize
