I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
She just called to say she can support a full bottle of vodka between "the girls" now. I'm going over, don't try and stop me.
I told him I had AIDS after he bit me. His dad cried. I think I just ruined the little guy's 3rd birthday, but he had in coming.
Why we can't turn this into a healthy friendship where I cheat on my boyfriend with you and you feel better knowing everything wrong with my life is beyond me.
Are you responsible for the syringes and miniature cactus garden that has magically taken over my fridge?
Someone broke into my car and stole it then left me $300 to pay for the damages with a lovely note that said "we just couldn't pass up the boxed wine... Sorry about the window."
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
Do you remember peeing in the sink while I was throwing up?
No ma'am, I do not. I found a video of us trying to do a trust fall though. Emphasis on the trying.
PokemonGo as navigation to get some at 5:13 AM. Life choices, yo.
Gary just stuck his dick in his Guinness. I can't even make this up
I blame everything on you. My broken heart, my fucked up liver and my twisted mind.
It was great. Except he kept asking me to lick his butthole, I was like firm no
I'm too depressed to drink my wine. That is what I would call a serious problem
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