If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with
i don't think my family understands the severity of a twenty first birthday.
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
Some guy offered you 100 bucks last night to suck your toes. I had to drag you away while you were yelling at me, "Stop money cock blocking me!"
That's just where I'm at in my life.
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
So I bring Danny back to the apartment for the first time and my roommate is curled up in the beanbag in the middle of the floor, wearing nothing but her uggs, high out of her mind and watching Harry potter... She offered us kettle corn.
He asked if he could come over tomorrow....
Straight up asked lady in a lime green jumpsuit how to make your ass clap. That thing wiggled more beautifully than ocean waves at sunset
Look I'm really high right now, and if I were to leave this house, it would be for the sole purpose of getting an ice cream sandwich. So can you please just do it.
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
That awkward moment when you realize that last night you walked from in n out to petco, bought a mouse for $3, named it mogar, taught it how to skateboard on a techdeck, made it a home out of a trash can, fed it fruity pebbles and cheese, and then forgot where you left it.
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
Randomize
