Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
i decided i am going on the Justin Bobby plan for success. Don't cut my hair for a year, don't shave for a month, land Audrina Patridge. Game on.
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
so, she was so drunk she tried stabbing me with a corn dog stick
This essay is so getting done. I am spurred on by thoughts of test-driving your newly shaven face by sitting on it as soon as humanly possible.
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
Future roommate keeps sending me pictures of cool shit she has for our dorm and I'm just like "... I have a set of Aggie wine glasses a great set of tits."
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
You've never really lived until you tell someone you have an STD over snap chat.
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
I drove them away with my sparkling personality and LOTR references.
I'm about 40% drunk. You know, not drunk enough to light the bar on fire, but drunk enough to let the cougar hit on me.
Peru was great. He sent me a text after thanking me for my amazing morals which confused me but made me oddly proud...then he texted a correction. He meant my amazing oral. Sadly this Made me prouder. Fuck u bitches and ur morally inhibiting gag reflexes.
Randomize
