Based on her brazillian stubble I would guess her plan had been to wait one more date before sleeping with me. Seems the plan was flexible.
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
Just watched my roommate stuff a sandwich in his pocket because we're out of paper plates.
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
Getting drunk in an Applebee's pray for me
Lord god protect this child
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
Operation rebound complete... I fucked the bouncer
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
I'm glad I date someone who likes the simple things. Sex, kittens, and McDonald's.
Don't do him, he's a Dolphins fan! A FUCKING DOLPHINS FAN!
Im glad your laughing because im currently convincing my penis you didnt mean it and its all gunna be ok.
There’s an entire generation of people out there who didn’t grow up watching Mr. Rogers and it shows. These Boomers need to get their shit together.
Randomize
