Please tell me I didn't pass out while we were having sex last night... and if so I am sooooo sorry.
I just five second ruled a donut I dropped at starbucks, everyones staring
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
Nothing is more awkward than taking a dump while someone is crying in the bathroom.
I had to explain to the waiter that I'm not the DD because I can't drive, but as the Designated 'Make Sure No One Gets Roofied Or Hit By A Car On The Walk Home'-er, I should still get the free drinks.
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
if I was any more soft right now, my penis would be a liquid
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
I guess she was just worried I'd end up sleeping with you again
It's not too late to disappoint her you know...
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
How far are you from my house? Do I have time to masturbate before you get here?
Why is the microwave staring at me?!
he's single and there are thong briefs.
It’s the biggest dick I’ve ever seen. His IQ drops 25 points when he’s hard because there’s no blood going to his brain
Randomize
