is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
He came to my house drunk at two a.m., got in the hot tub, refused to get out until he smoked a blunt, and said "That's what brothers and sisters are for."
I think that's the key to being an adult though... Get those rapid fire beer shits out I the way early, then you can go about your grown man business
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
He's just so adorable. And I don't want to fuck someone who's adorable.
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
This is my college life. Rolling at 4PM on a Wednesday to skrillex in the parking lot of a mexican restaurant.
He wouldn't shut up so I started sending him pictures of animal dicks
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
Bruh, I wanna absorb into the deck.
I wanna become a plank.
God I love xanex.
I need you to get the emergency bail money out if the stuffed panda and go to the police station tot bail me out. I should be there in 20 minutes.
Randomize
