I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
There's this guy beside me dancing with this girl with no panties on. When I looked at him he said he's babysitting his bestfriend's girlfriend since he can't come out.
What a good friend
After he came all over my face, he proceeded to give me a high five. I can't even act upset because I always put myself in these situations. Did I mention D3: Mighty Ducks was playing in the background?
The best thing happened. Some guy was butchering Conway Twitty at karoke and the power went off in the whole bar. And someone shouted "you pissed jesus off when you messed with conway!"
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
Woke up with a text saying "when I get to see them titties again lil ma??" With 8 beads around my neck & an empty bottle of vodka in my arms.
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
You are the jesus of drinking
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
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