there is a school bus full of santas parked in front of the liquor store
i got really high and listened to the spongebob squarepants theme song and, i swear to god, it was in german.
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
She was holding a turtle doing a beer bong out of a flower watering can.
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
Seriously, come get him. He's not even a person anymore. He's a loud, drunk, cock-blocking wrecking ball.
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
I told him if he cums in my mouth he has to buy me a cake that says "sorry I came in your mouth"
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
Sunday mornings are confusing. Like. I can't decide if I want to go for a run or start drinking
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
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