we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
Just a heads up before you get home. Took the shelves out of the fridge so i could fit the beer ball and bucket of riot punch. Apparently i decided the stove was the best place to keep them. They got cooked when we pre heated to cook a bird we shot. This may be the final straw for our security deposit
For future reference "I'm too drunk to come today" is an acceptable line to get out of work. I love my job
I can't even look at my running shoes. I swear I drank more in the last 2 days than the last 6 months combined
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
Remember don't think of it as being an alcoholic until something bad happens.
Think of it as Mythbusters for people who say you're going to get arrested or die
BECKY! ITS ANDY FROM LAST NIGHT WITH THE PILL
Andy, Sorry you have the wrong number. But good luck with Becky!
That super awesome moment when the guy who threw up in your bed last night crawls into your roommate's bed the next morning...Naked...She was in it.
I'd be 10x more excited if going out didn't require pants or the general giving of fucks
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
Right now, I'm sitting in my room, drinking beer, eating double stuff Oreos, taking bites straight from a block of cheese, and watching Anchor Man 2 trailers. Finals week at its finest
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
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