do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
Just fyi NOT a good idea to drunkenly insert your NuvaRing after chopping jalepeno peppers
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
you assured me you'd make it home safe because your pizza rolls were waiting up for you.
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
I knew it was on when he was dancing on stage and I gave him a dollar so in return he ripped my tit out of my shirt and started sucking on it IN THE MIDDLE OF THE BAR.
If this first date goes well and I like him, I won't sleep with him. But if it doesn't go well, I'll sleep with him.
Just saw the ex while I was at CVS at 3am buying Depends for my heavy flow
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
On a scale of 0 to Thanksgiving, there is no amount of food that fights against tequila.
Naw dude theres seriously a lobster in my sock drawer. Why?
I keep worrying she's gonna have a repeat of the time the ceiling fan was talking in Chinese
Randomize
